10295.) My depression has pushed my heart into this big black hole deep within my chest. And I’m constantly trying to fight for its release.

I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry that everything is horrible. But I can’t just go up to you anymore, can’t you see that? I can’t talk to you even if I wanted to. Maybe you expect me to make an exception (because I want you to talk to me so badly I can’t speak to anymore right now) but this thing that’s wrong with me  is so hard to live with I don’t really want to live. I don’t know about you, but I wanted you to fight harder, but I feel like you just gave up, and you’ve festered this hate inside you against me for a really long time and now you’re letting it show. You hated me the night I hung up on you to cry, and this is sad because you’ll talk to everyone but me, and I can’t help but compare you to him but this is worse. This is so much worse. It never hurt this bad. I don’t want to keep doing this. 
I don’t want to do anything.  

(Source: blogconfession, via blogconfession)